Well, school has been out (a big hooray!) for half the summer (not a big hooray), but the end of the school year didn't come with a sigh of satisfaction. In fact, quite of bit of angst consumed me as I contemplated teaching another year and my enthusiasm to teach Romeo and Juliet during the last weeks after core testing was gone Yes, I know, sounding a bit melodramatic. I wish it weren't true, and maybe it's still some residual hormone imbalance from a "mighty change," but nonetheless, the anxiety toward teaching school is there.
Just the Friday before the final week of school, three young men stayed after school (at my ushering) to get some work done so they could make a grade in English this quarter. These seemingly lax, apathetic boys ended up standing/sitting around in my cozy little 10 by 10 office for two hours telling me very difficult details about their lives that make school life, and life in general, hard. Really hard.
Crying at times, one boy, who has failed my class every quarter because he would just quit coming to school for weeks at a time, laid out his family story. Remorse and sorrow overcame me. All YEAR I had not bothered to ever really talk to him. When I could have been support, I was just one more face of consternation. I let his seemingly carefree-guy demeanor and school-doesn't-matter facade fool me into . Always a natural smile, as if his face muscles knew no other position.
The most amazing part of this was to see his sincerity and listen as he spoke from the most authentically kind heart I have ever sensed in a student. He couldn't answer what the word "connotation" means on 7 different tests (yes 7), but he sure knows how to control it in his speech. He was failing English every quarter, but his practical use of it was superior. (Of course, I changed his grade for the quarter and offered him some ways to easily make every other F up this summer.)
In his kind way, he told me that I was a good teacher, but kids are different now. I quote: "The level of strictness has lowered so much that if something happens, the kid won't be in trouble; the teacher will." Naturally, I asked him and the other boys to help me out with real live ways to change my classroom to be better teaching and learning for today's kids. And they did.
I have vowed that, even though I sometimes have past students tell me I was their best English teacher, I will give it one more year to try to adapt. If it doesn't work out, I'll be moving on. Now that I have medical benefits with Noni, the proposition to try an entrepreneurial venture isn't so daunting.
Friday, July 12, 2013
Yea SCOTUS!
Well, I'm ashamed of myself. The history-making, land-shaking, LGBT-validating Supreme Court rulings of striking down DOMA and Proposition 8 have yet to make it to my blog. And to top it off, they were made on the FOURTH anniversary of that tranquil evening on the banks of the Mississippi when we kissed for the first time in front of family, danced and cried happy tears, and said 'I do'. (I can't believe I just had to stop and think about how to spell Mississippi.)
So how DO I feel? Well, like...finally. Maybe now that the highest court in the land says that it is unConstitiutional to discriminate against our right to be married, some real changes will occur in this country. (Seriously, why the heck does unConstitutional have a squiggly line under it? You wouldn't capitalize un but Constitution is a proper noun. I'm leaving it that way.)
I believe in numerology, so I knew that the rulings would be in our favor. Think about it DOMA is a four-letter acronym, and it was our fourth anniversary. Coincidence? I think not! And Prop 8...half of 8 is 4, and Prop is a four-letter abbreviation. 2013? 2 +0= 2, 1+3=4... 2X4=8. You bet baby, it had to come down. (This is not calculated from some scientific numerology method. I came up with it myself, folks. Simple math.)
Now there are 13 states in the U.S. of A that have marriage equality. In keeping with numerology, I told Noni that we should plant a tree or bush for every state that comes around. (It was her idea to get trees for our anniversary, so I just built on that idea because I am into politics more than her.) So we already planted three this year, so now only ten more. That may sound crazy like we will end up as forest dwellers by the time all the states come around (and believe history, they will... albeit my bet is on Utah coming in dead last clinging to and claiming it's God's will to uphold "traditional family values," whilst polygamist branches laden their pedigree charts). Which brings me back to trees, the ones we will be planting and inundated by...we have a big lot, over an acre, that needs some trees to block out the noise and the view of the gravel pit. We'll be fine for a while even if we start planting one for all the countries that start legalizing equality in marriage. A shout out to New Zealand!
You may be curious to know if this ruling has made an everyday difference in our lives. You bet! When I had my check-out with the principal at the end of the school-year, he asked me to tell him what insurance I would be choosing for next year since we are losing yet more benefits and going to a high-deductible plan. He was on duty trying to get people to predict which plan to be on according to how healthy or accident prone they might be. How do you think this sounded to him, "Uh, I won't be able to say until a Supreme Court ruling"? (Ha! I still chuckle at the hyperbole this seems to be, and you should have seen his face. Something like{?: /] if I were to try to draw it with symbols, which is working out like when I draw a face on an Etch-a-Sketch.) But then I explained to him (a former LDS bishop) that if DOMA is ruled unConstitutional, then I will be getting on Noni's insurance. And so that's it! That's how our life has changed--I'm called a spouse to Noni on a federal piece of paper and have her benefits without having to have "power of attorney" or something. (But P.S., we can only do that in Utah where our marriage is not recognized because we were married legally in Iowa, and she is employed by the federal government.) Now, I am putting off calling my principal (now promoted to superintendent) to tell him I am opting out of the HD insurance because I want to see his face when I tell him in person.
By the way, if you are reading this, could you please comment or follow me or something because I am thinking about using this blog as a secret diary. The internet. It will be a perfect hiding place! Better than under my mattress and my kids will never find it.
So how DO I feel? Well, like...finally. Maybe now that the highest court in the land says that it is unConstitiutional to discriminate against our right to be married, some real changes will occur in this country. (Seriously, why the heck does unConstitutional have a squiggly line under it? You wouldn't capitalize un but Constitution is a proper noun. I'm leaving it that way.)
I believe in numerology, so I knew that the rulings would be in our favor. Think about it DOMA is a four-letter acronym, and it was our fourth anniversary. Coincidence? I think not! And Prop 8...half of 8 is 4, and Prop is a four-letter abbreviation. 2013? 2 +0= 2, 1+3=4... 2X4=8. You bet baby, it had to come down. (This is not calculated from some scientific numerology method. I came up with it myself, folks. Simple math.)
Now there are 13 states in the U.S. of A that have marriage equality. In keeping with numerology, I told Noni that we should plant a tree or bush for every state that comes around. (It was her idea to get trees for our anniversary, so I just built on that idea because I am into politics more than her.) So we already planted three this year, so now only ten more. That may sound crazy like we will end up as forest dwellers by the time all the states come around (and believe history, they will... albeit my bet is on Utah coming in dead last clinging to and claiming it's God's will to uphold "traditional family values," whilst polygamist branches laden their pedigree charts). Which brings me back to trees, the ones we will be planting and inundated by...we have a big lot, over an acre, that needs some trees to block out the noise and the view of the gravel pit. We'll be fine for a while even if we start planting one for all the countries that start legalizing equality in marriage. A shout out to New Zealand!
You may be curious to know if this ruling has made an everyday difference in our lives. You bet! When I had my check-out with the principal at the end of the school-year, he asked me to tell him what insurance I would be choosing for next year since we are losing yet more benefits and going to a high-deductible plan. He was on duty trying to get people to predict which plan to be on according to how healthy or accident prone they might be. How do you think this sounded to him, "Uh, I won't be able to say until a Supreme Court ruling"? (Ha! I still chuckle at the hyperbole this seems to be, and you should have seen his face. Something like{?: /] if I were to try to draw it with symbols, which is working out like when I draw a face on an Etch-a-Sketch.) But then I explained to him (a former LDS bishop) that if DOMA is ruled unConstitutional, then I will be getting on Noni's insurance. And so that's it! That's how our life has changed--I'm called a spouse to Noni on a federal piece of paper and have her benefits without having to have "power of attorney" or something. (But P.S., we can only do that in Utah where our marriage is not recognized because we were married legally in Iowa, and she is employed by the federal government.) Now, I am putting off calling my principal (now promoted to superintendent) to tell him I am opting out of the HD insurance because I want to see his face when I tell him in person.
By the way, if you are reading this, could you please comment or follow me or something because I am thinking about using this blog as a secret diary. The internet. It will be a perfect hiding place! Better than under my mattress and my kids will never find it.
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